It's February 2, Groundhog Day.  The day the Washington Football Team said they would unveil their new name.  How could it not be The Washington Hogs?  A throwback to much more prosperous times for the franchise.  Announced on Groundhog Day.  Unless, a team incapable of executing most misdirection plays on the field was pulling one off it.  Let them think it's Hogs, boy will they be surprised.

As true to form, a franchise which had over a year and a half to come up with a new name, could not only fail to get this right but in the process, failed to keep it a secret. Joe Theismann, a true insider who I guess needs to be in order to broadcast 2 or 3 preseason games in August, leaked the news on the radio.  Then, he made a feeble attempt to backtrack, proving that an acting career was never in the cards for him despite his never meeting a camera or microphone that he did not want caress.  (On a side note, a friend of mine purchased a Joe Theismann "cameo" for my birthday.  Not sure why Joe as I don't have any real allegiance to him.  Nevertheless, I must admit he solidly nailed it.)

The same can not be said for what is now known as The Washington Commanders.  My wife had the very same initial thought as perhaps some of you...are they going to call them the Commies?  In this day and age, it needs to have some shortened version.  In the NFL alone, we have the Boys, the Fish (or Fins), the Niners, the Jags, the Broncs, the Hawks, the Cards, the Vikes, the Pack, the Bucs, the Pats, and I am sure I am missing others.  If not Commies, then seriously, what?

I didn't follow this name change story very closely.  Maybe there were fan polls, or focus groups.  Or maybe, just maybe, one despicable owner heard the word and thought, "Commander.  I like that."  The last time I gave this much thought to Commander (no disrespect meant to our military of which I am not a part of), I was a little kid watching Commander McBragg cartoons.  (And if you were born later than say 1973, you may be out of luck on that reference.)

If we really wanted a name to help epitomize the team's "beloved" owner, why is this team not The Washington Predators?  It can work in Nashville but not in DC?  (Yes, I get the dual meaning.)  Apparently, there were "trademark issues" with Wolves and Redwolves that prevented the team from using these names.  That's right, Snyder is so hated that people off the street buy these domains so that they can attempt to extort him by purchasing the rights to these names.

No, the last laugh is not on these entrepreneurs.  It's on those of us (myself included) who want to see this franchise prosper in spite of its ownership.  And to think, we could have been:

The Washington Gridlock (between traffic and Congress, can Washington be better represented?)
The Washington Beltway (let's go Belts)
The Washington Hogs (or Redhogs if you feel that Red must be a part of this)
The Washington Theismanns (would have leaked in 2021)

And let's not forget the obvious, The Washington Football Team.  The Team.  Or, The Football Team.  If you thought it sounded dumb before, you undoubtedly love it now.